There's Always Mini-Golf... but why?

Recently, I was asked as to why I call this blog "There's Always Mini-Golf", and I often respond cryptically, saying "Because there always is". But some of you might actually wonder WHY there's always mini-golf, and why I feel the need to name a blog after it. (And make it the signature on my non-work e-mail).

This takes us back to the dark times in the long long ago. (Give it up for Thunderdome). Resigned with accepting that I am a better projectionist than pretty much anything else in the world, I fancied myself a slacker philosopher, dispensing pearls of wisdom to the unsuspecting. What would make them more unsuspecting is the fact that I came up with most of my bon mots while high, which would explain the slacker part. (Well, support the slacker stuff, really. Who would listen to a slacker that ISN'T a pothead?)

I don't recall many of my brilliant philosophies due to poor penmanship and a mysterious condition that doesn't allow me to remember too many things. (Never could figure out why). But the one that stuck with me through the years, and with others if you can believe it, is "There's always mini-golf".

What does it mean? Well, life is pretty vast. Ebbs and flows are always ever present, and sometimes we tend to lose focus on things. Sometimes we get hung up over a girl, (If you're me, this is usually ALWAYS the case), a jackass at work, an obnoxious family member or members who take advantage of you and your kindness, etc. not to mention all that fun stuff going on in the middle east, political corruption, reality television, etc. All that stuff can be very taxing on the mind. And rightly so, don't feel I'm dismissing these events and people in life.

But for all the negativity, all the things that are holding you down and making your life a living hell, there's gotta be something good to hold on to. Something to look forward to. That's where mini-golf comes in. Because there's ALWAYS mini-golf.

Mind you, mini-golf is not mini-golf. It's that one thing in life, kind of like Jack Palance's belief system in his academy award winning turn as Curly in City Slickers. (Not his bullshit nihilistic tendencies as Duke in the far inferior City Slickers 2: The Legend Of Curly's Gold). There's the one thing in life that makes it worthwhile. It could be your kid, or going to the movies, or playing video games on your friend's couch after a long day of work, or that one day a month when you meet your friends for a drink and catch up. It can be anything, really. That one activity/person/element in your life that no matter how bad things get, that will always be there for you. And yes indeed, sometimes mini-golf can in fact mean mini-golf. (Or putt-putt for you down south folk).

So go out there and seek your own mini-golf. Lord knows that in these times, sometimes you just need that one thing in your life to be a stop to the swirling chaos around you and give you inner peace. Lame ass philosophy, I realize, but it's true and it works.

And for the record, mine used to be mini-golf. Especially when I realized I could play out here all year round. And despite the fact that the titlee of "Greatest First Date Ever" did indeed include a rousing game of mini golf (which I won, I'm no pushover just because I want to date this girl), there are now too many bad memories associated. now I must seek my own NEW mini-golf.

And this week, it's that midnight show of Snakes on a Plane.