Sunday, March 28, 2010

It must be some sort of...

Hot Tub Time Machine

I'm not gonna lie to you, it's pretty fuckin funny. Stupid, yes, but it's called Hot Tub Time Machine. You get what you're paying for.

Box Office Report: I'm tired of 3-D edition.

Dude here again. These 3D numbers are getting to be ridiculous. It's getting to the point where no movies will stand a chance against 3D movies. I like 3-D movies, but I also like seeing regular movies. And I don't need to pay these exorbitant prices for the experience of getting a headache.

God, I'm getting old. .

This weekend, holy crap! A 3-D animated movie took the top spot with a larger than normal take! Who could have seen that coming? Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).

1. How To Train Your Dragon (Par/DW) $43.3, 4055 screens, week 1, $43.3 total

2. Alice in Wonderland (BV)- $17.3, 3384 screens, week 4, $293.1 total

3. Hot Tub Time Machine (MGM)- $13.6, 2754 screens, week 1, $13.6 total

4. The Bounty Hunter (Sony) - $12.4, 3074 screens, week 2, $38.8 total

5. Diary of a Wimpy Kid (Fox) - $10.0, 3083 screens, week 2, $35.7 total

6. She's Out of My League (Par)- $3.5, 2432 screens, week 3, $25.6 total

7. Green Zone (Uni) - $3.3, 2557 screens, week 3, $30.4 total

8. Shutter Island (Par)- $3.1, 2123 screens, week 6, $120.6 total

9. Repo Men (Uni)- $3.0, 2519 screens, week 2, $11.3 total

10. Our Family Wedding (FoxS) - $2.2, 1132 screens, week 3, $17.0 total

So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means that when you raise the prices of the 3D tickets (as was reported earlier this week) then the 3D movies are going to make the most money. This is the future of movies, people. Accept it. Thanks James Cameron. Oh, and Dragon made $43 million dollars. Yay.

The lack of 3D screens deflated Alice's take a little bit, but still took second place. I refer you to the previous paragraph for the "Yay" comment.

Sadly, this oversaturation of family films in 3D made an uphill climb even steeper for the beloved Hot Tub Time Machine. A $13 million opening is fine, yes, but really people, why didn't more of you go see Hot Tub Time Machine? Unless you all bought tickets to the 3D movies and snuck into it. Maybe that's what happened. That's what I'll tell myself so that I can sleep better at night.

Nobody seems to really care about the other movies out. However, it should be noted for the first time in FIFTEEN WEEKS (!) Avatar has left the top ten. Farewell you creepy blue digital bastard. Thanks for changing the game. In the wrong way.

Below the radar, Atom Egoyan's Chloe opened up on 350 screens and took in about $1 million dollars. There was no 3D, but there is Liam Neeson. And we all know that Liam Neeson can do whatever the hell he wants, especially if it includes a nude Amanda Seyfried. Which this movie may or may not have.

So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, Liam Neeson releases the Kraken with Clash of the Titans, which is thankfully being presented in pedestrian two dimensions, or you can be a man and see it in 3-D!!!! Oh, and a Tyler Perry movie opens, also possibly in 3D.

Until next weekend.......

(All Numbers courtesy of Box Office Mojo)

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Box Office REPOrt: Repo Men didn't fare as well as the others.

Dude here again. I'm very excited to be presenting you the numbers this week. Not for any selfish reasons at all. It's because I enjoy writing them. I enjoy getting up at the crack of 11:30 (Pacific Time) stumbling my way to the computer, reading numbers, writing numbers, hitting the crack pipe, coming up with witty things to say about movies making money. I'm living the dream, people!

Provided the dream involves being paid in candy.

This weekend, a showdown at the... no, it's Alice again. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).

1. Alice in Wonderland (BV)- $34.5, 3739 screens, week 3, $265.8 total

2. Diary of a Wimpy Kid (Fox) - $21.8, 3077 screens, week 1, $21.8 total

3. The Bounty Hunter (Sony) - $21.0, 3074 screens, week 1, $21.0 total

4. Repo Men (Uni)- $6.1, 2521 screens, week 1, $6.1 total

5. She's Out of My League (Par)- $6.0, 2958 screens, week 2, $19.9 total

6. Green Zone (Uni) - $5.9, 3004 screens, week 2, $24.7 total

7. Shutter Island (Par)- $4.7, 2704 screens, week 5, $115.7 total

8. Avatar (Fox) $4.0, 1236 screens, week 14, $736.8 total

9. Our Family Wedding (FoxS) - $3.8, 1609 screens, week 2, $13.6 total

10. Remember Me (Sum)- $3.3, 2215 screens, week 2, $13.3 total

So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means that anyone releasing anything seems to be in a fight to reach second place. And as my high school track coach once told me, second place is really the first loser. (Note, I wasn't on the track team, I just heard him say that once). But Alice continues to rake in the green, thanks to the 3-D and everyone's fascination with the source material. Or love of Johnny Depp. Or all of the above. I don't know, I still haven't seen it yet.

In a surprise move, Diary of a Wimpy Kid took second place over the much more hyped (and the absolutely dreadful) Bounty Hunter. Sure, both took in around $21 million, but let's be honest, unless you're a kid who knows the books or a parent who's forced to take them, you wouldn't expect it to do that well. Kudos! As for the Bounty Hunter, you know what you've done.

Alas, poor Repo Men. Looks like the film couriers will be Repo-ing this one in 2 weeks. Damn shame, really, as it's a pretty fun flick and it deserved an audience. Poor Universal, between this and the steep drop off of Green Zone, they better hope they have an impressive summer, otherwise more heads will roll. (Although that means I could be running things there this time next year!)

Avatar seems to be slowing down, eh? Strangely enough, because it didn't win the Bst Picture, my esteem for it has risen immeasurably. I want to see it again in IMAX now, and I don't mind paying for it.

Below the radar, The Runaways, a movie with Dakota Fanning and K-Stew about the chick band from the 70s that promises a kiss between them opened up on 244 screens and took in $803,000. Impressive for a film I'm told "makes you feel creepy, like you want to go door-to-door and announce yourself to your neighbors." Also, the Hubble 3-D movie opened up, which I am all for. It took in $453,000 on 39 screens. Take THAT, Avatar!

So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, four words: Hot. Tub. Time. Machine.

Until next weekend.......

(All Numbers courtesy of Box Office Mojo)

Friday, March 19, 2010

Let's Get Sushi and Not.. Oh wait, wrong movie.

I checked out Repo Men. I dug Repo Men. I suggest you do the same.

If not for me, at least do it for Jude Law. Sky Captain needs your help to see his movies.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Reviews and stuff

Yeah, I've been slacking, but I moved. And now, my laptop decided to shut down on me, which is AWESOME!

Anyway, I managed to write a few reviews and pieces. One's for Shutter Island, this one's for The Crazies, and this is for She's Out of My League.

Then, for extra added bonus pleasure, here's a piece about Five Director's Cuts that are better than the original Theatrical Release. (I wrote it awhile back, and needed something for the site to make up for my 3 week internet-less dwelling.


Box Office Report: now in 4D!!!!

Dude here again. Trying to get back in the swing of things. Thankfully the box office numbers have been generous. Have you heard there's some bit of legislation that will actually let you bet on what movie is going to be number one at the box office? That's both ridiculous and fantastic.

And what's best is that if it goes through, that makes me a guru!

This weekend, a number of films are released in the hopes that they'll knock down the 3-D champ, and they all fail. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).

1. Alice in Wonderland (BV)- $62.0, 3728 screens, week 2, $208.6 total

2. Green Zone (Uni) - $14.5, 3003 screens, week 1, $14.5 total

3. She's Out of My League (Par)- $9.6, 2956 screens, week 1, $8.3 total

4. Remember Me (Sum)- $8.3, 2212 screens, week 1, $8.3 total

5. Shutter Island (Par)- $8.1, 3356 screens, week 4, $108.0 total

6. Our Family Wedding (FoxS) - $7.6, 1605 screens, week 1, $7.6 total

7. Avatar (Fox) $6.6, 1718 screens, week 13, $730.3 total

8. Brooklyn's Finest (Over) - $4.29, 1939 screens, week 2, $21.3 total

9. Cop Out (WB) - $4.23, 2882 screens, week 3, $39.4 total

10. The Crazies (Over)- $3.6, 2359 screens, week 3, $33.3 total

So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means the proliferation of 3-D titles in the future are going to make life difficult for movies that just want to tell a story in 2-D, sans spectacle. Tim Burton's Alice took the top spot once again, and made an obscene amount of money once again, but the difference between the one and two spots again are a bit distressing. Sure it will die out, like all trends, but we have to act now, people! If we don't start living in two dimensions, then what kind of world do we expect to have for your children?

Green Zone, or as everybody else is calling it Bourne Minus Bourne, took second place, but a far from respectable take considering how well Bourne movies do. Of course nobody goes to see Iraq war movies, not even the one that won Best Picture this year, so that might have something to do with it.

She's Out of My League took the hint and didn't attract too many people. Now She will be Out of My Local Movie Theater! (They need to pay me for these bon mots of brilliance). And Remember Me shows that there are far too many puns to be regarding a film's audience. Oh, and that Robert Pattinson can't open a movie to save his life unless he gets all sparkly in the sunshine. Stupid Twilight.

Our Family Wedding opened up, and aside from a giant billboard I saw up the street that's in front of the studio that made the film, I haven't seen any bit of advertising at all for the flick. I had no idea it actually came out, and apparently, neither did you. Hopefully it will eventually find an audience, but it was just a bad weekend to come out.

Below the radar, a movie called The Exploding Girl opened up, and I'm fairly sure it's not a Japanese movie which means that the title is probably metaphoric and the movie is probably boring. Or nowhere near as awesome as something called Exploding Girl should be. Anyway, it opened on one screen and took in $6000. DO the math to realize how much less that is than Alice in Wonderland. The answer may surprise you.

So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, a few more movies try but will ultimately bow before the Alice, including an awesome looking sci-fi flick called Repo Men that stars Jude Law, which means I am sold on it!

Until next weekend.......

(Alright, so they're 3-Ds. Sue me)

(All Numbers courtesy of

Sunday, March 07, 2010

The return of the Box Office Report!

Dude here again. I've been out on sabbatical the past couple of weeks, as I've been moving into a new place, and had a ludicrous ordeal of unfortunate events in an attempt to get hooked up to the interwebs. It's long and stupid, and still not totally resolved, but I have a basic use and can at least give you some ridiculously large box office numbers.

Truth be told, though, I really didn't miss much, right?

This weekend, a juggernaut of an opening for Tim Burton leaves everything else hanging it's head in shame. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).

1. Alice in Wonderland (BV)- $116.3, 3728 screens, week 1, $116.3 total

2. Brooklyn's Finest (Over) - $13.5, 1936 screens, week 1, $13.5 total

3. Shutter Island (Par)- $13.3, 3178 screens, week 3, $95.8 total

4. Cop Out (WB) - $9.1, 3150 screens, week 2, $32.3 total

5. Avatar (Fox) $7.7, 2163 screens, week 12, $720.1 total

6. The Crazies (Over)- $7.0, 2479 screens, week 2, $27.4 total

7. Percy Jackson and The Olympians... (Fox) - $5.1, 2994 screens, week 4, $78.0 total

8. Valentine's Day (WB)- $4.2, 3040 screens, week 4, $106.4 total

9. Crazy Heart (FoxS)- $3.3, 1274 screens, week 12, $29.5 total

10. Dear John (ScrGm) - $2.8, 2496 screens, week 5, $76.6 total

So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means HOLY CRAP! That's an obscene amount of money. Complain all you want about Avatar's increased 3-D ticket prices, the same can be said about Alice. Even more so, being that the flick can run more times a day than Avatar could. Still, that's an ass load of cash to overhaul. I'm sure it broke records, but I'm just too tired to look them up.

Brooklyn's Finest, you opened respectably for yourself. You're just $103 million off from the first place. But let's be honest, nobody saw that coming. Well done, and it's nice to see Wesley Snipes on a screen again.

Shutter island, the previous number one movie, might be the number 2, but it still doesn't forgive the ridiculous overuse of the word "Marshall" spoken with obnoxious Bah-ston accents for two and a half hours. (Yet, I still liked the flick!) Cop Out hasd become Kevin Smith's highest grossing movie, which is good for him.

Do you realize that, for about a day, the number one movie of this year was Valentine's Day? Think about what that means.

Crazy Heart, still digging that ninth place spot, but watch it go up as soon as Jeff Bridges wins the Oscar. Update: He did win it!. Way to go, The Dude! He even sounded like The dude in his acceptance speech. That's just the tops.

Below the radar, I got nothing, really. It's all about the Alice in Wonderland, and the state of 3-D prices.

So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, I', predicting that Alive will continue to reign, as Matt Damon tries to recapture the Bourne magic and kick someone's ass while wearing a ridiculous scarf. Seriously, check out the poster, you'll see.

Until next weekend.......