Sunday, April 19, 2009

Box Office Report Again

Dude here again. I'm a little wiped out. Last night I attended the Dolph Lundgren Film Festival. As a child, I could only dream of such things. And until last night, it remained a dream. And then, well kids, it's fair to say that every once in awhile, a dream can come true. Suffice it to say, my butt hurts from how much ass the event kicked.

And it has nothing to do with the uncomfortable seats in the theater I was in for 10 hours.

This weekend, The fast and the furious have moved on, and Jason Statham tries his turn. And some kid named Zac Efron gets to star in a movie. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).

1. 17 Again (WB) - $24.0, 3255 screens, week 1, $24.0 total

2. State of Play (Uni)- $14.0, 2803 screens, week 1, $14.0 total

3. Monsters Vs. Aliens (Par/DW) - $12.9, 3662 screens, week 4, $162.7 total

4. Hannah Montana The Movie (BV) - $12.6, 3118 screens, week 2, $56.1 total

5. Fast and Furious (Uni)- $12.2, 3674 screens, week 3, $136.7 total

6. Crank: High Voltage (LGF) - $6.5, 2223 screens, week 1, $6.5 total

7. Observe and Report (WB) - $4.0, 2727 screens, week 2, $18.6 total

8. Knowing (Sum) $4.0, 2405 screens, week 5, $73.6 total

9. I Love You, Man (Par/DW)- $3.3, 2202 screens, week 5, $64.6 total

10. The Haunting in Connecticut (LGF)- $3.1, 2255 screens, week 4, $51.9 total

So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means Zac Efron is the 2009 LeBouf! Look for him to appear in a live action GoBots movie next summer. Mark my words. But 17 Again took the top spot this weekend. In an unrelated note, this film is NOT a prequel to the George Burns/Charlie Schlatter vehicle from 1988, where the two leads switch bodies. That was a big trend in movies for awhile back in the late 1980s. Does this Efron mean that we'll have more of those movies again?

State of Play, starring Russell Crowe and Ben Affleck of all people, took in a respectable $14 million. This is remarkable for two reasons: it signals the waning decline of smart thrillers, and it provides reporters with another excuse to bring up that time Russell Crowe was angry and threw a phone at a dude's head. (See how I slyly did it? That's why I get paid the big bucks, people).

Sadly, Crank: High Voltage failed to spark any wattage with audiences, taking in about half the previous installment's opening weekend bow. (I feel shame). My friend Omar was compelled to text me from the middle of the movie, though, and he wrote thusly: "Watching Crank 2. This is one of the craziest movies I have ever seen!" So, obviously, I needed to spread the word around to check it out. Because Omar LOVED the original Crank. I had a lot of texts from him while he was watching that. If I'm not mistaken, one said "Praise God for bestowing us a motion picture like Crank!". True story.

What the hell is going on with Knowing? How did it make over $70 million? What bizarre Nic Cage-iverse am I living in? And why isn't Dolph Lundgren in any of these movies in the top ten?!?!?

There you have my amazing break down. Next week, the calm before the storm of SummerMovieXXXplosion(TM)!! Although with the numbers all year, are the weekend numbers going to a surprise to anybody? I predict not.

Until next weekend.......


R.BillMountain said...

Dolph Lundgren Film Fest, like beer, proves that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Coffee Maker said...

after seeing 17 Again i think that Zac Efron might become the next big icon by which we define "male hotness"