Dude here again. I come to bring grave news, and at the same time, I have a strange sense of deja vu. I seem to remember this weekend last year, and the shock and general dismay I presented with the moviegoing public for making Big Momma's House 2 the number one movie in the country.
This weekend, an unbelievably awful film takes the number one spot, proving my theory that a movie doesn't have to be good, so long as it has a MySpace page and a Borat joke. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates, the actuals will be available on Monday. Just to prove me wrong).
1. Epic Movie (Fox) - $19.2, 2801 screens, week 1, $19.2 total
2. Smokin Aces (Uni) - $14.26, 2218 screens, week 1, $14.26 total
3. Night At The Museum (Fox) - $9.45, 3241 screens, week 6, $216.7 total
4. Catch and Release (Sony) - $8.0, 1622 screens, week 1, $8.0 total
5. Stomp The Yard (Scr Gems) - $7.8, 2115 screens, week 3, $50.65 total
6. Dreamgirls (Par/DW)- $6.6, 2785 screens, week 7, $86.65 total
7. The Pursuit of Happyness (Sony) - $5.0, 3066 screens, week 7, $152.9 total
8. Pan's Labyrinth (PicHse) - $4.5, 823 screens, week 5, $16.25 total
9. The Queen (Mir) - $4.0, 1830 screens, week 18, $41.2 total
10. The Hitcher (Rogue)- $3.598, 2836 screens, week 2, $13.398 total
Ok, those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means that the people opted to see crap. Seriously. In a move I can barely begin to understand, Epic Movie took in almost $20 million dollars over the weekend. $20 million dollars for a movie that just recreates a scene from a famous and popular movie, and ends the scene with a dude getting kicked in the junk. For 90 minutes. With no connective tissue for the scenes to actually make the movie enjoyable, or coherent. Here's an idea for the 2 of the six writers of Scary Movie who gave us Epic Movie and Date Movie. It's called "Good Movie". It involves two key ingredients, a plot and originality. Best of luck on that one, fellas. But of course, the success of Epic Movie means that Fox interpret this to make more movies, and I'm fairly certain we could be seeing "Oscar Movie" this time next year, which is actually a great idea for a parody (especially to be released around this time of year), but these are not the people to make the film. For the love of God, please don't let them behind a camera again.
Smokin Aces did alright, which is fine. The movie deserves to make some money. Catch and Release didn't (forgive me, I'm channeling my inner hack) catch on with audiences or critics, who released their hard earned money to aforementioned Epic Movie. The mostly positive things I read about Catch and Release all involved Kevin Smith. Of course, I read all those things on the man's personal blog, so that info might be a bit skewed. (Or askewed if you're a Smith fan). And something called Blood and Chocolate, which I'm told was a popular book and is about teenage werewolves and is far from Ginger Snaps, opened in 15th, taking in $2.1 million.
The Academy Award nominations were announced this week, and it didn't really do that much more than last week's Golden Globe boost (or shenanigans, as I like to call them) did. Dreamgirls, probably the most talked about movie to NOT get a Best Picture Nomination EVER, dropped about 17% after expanding on to almost 600 more screens. While they can claim they have the most noms, it's only because they got 3 in best original song. (Nobody, by the way, seems to be pointing out that while Dreamgirls was "robbed" of a best pic nod, nobody is discussing the absence of Children of Men up there. Curious). The Queen did about the same as last week, as did Pan. (nice to see Pan up there, and with multiple nominations). The Departed was released on a few more screens, and appears below the top ten, just above Babel, and close to Letters From Iwo Jima. The fifth Best Picture nominated film, Little Miss Sunshine, is now available on DVD. Why not pick yourself up a copy, they make wonderful gifts.
And in the "This Piece Of Crap Is Still Making Money" series: Apocalypto took in $211,000 on 175 screens, bringing it's grand total to $50,205,000 in 8 weeks.
There you have my break down. Next week, something comes out. I think it's a horror movie. Go see Children of Men.
Until next weekend....