I loved Tron Legacy. Had an absolute blast, enjoyed the look, the feel, the sound, the simple story...
But then I started thinking about it.
And once that happens, it's game over, man.
So, I figure as long as I don't think about it, and think about the shiny lights and AWESOME Daft Punk score I'm fine. And as long as I don't think about creepy CG Polar Express lookin Jeff Bridges, it'll be alr... dammit!
Shinylightsshinylightsshinylights
You're ruining my zen state of mind, man.
(By the by, in case I haven't mentioned it, Black Swan is pretty great. A perfect blend of Aronofsky's sensibilities, and a film that has shades of equal parts early Polanski, Argento, and DePalma. Moviesonline has my review somewhere, I'm just too lazy to put up the link.
Also, Rare Exports is worth checking out if you can).
Also, no Box Office Report this week, but let's just assume it was Tron.
Dude here again. Are you starting to feel that holiday spirit? I feel that spirit by going to the mall, and singing generic, all encompassing holiday songs. It's bizarre, but I think everyone appreciates it, as it's both respectful and pleasant. Then we break into a flash mob that only performs the dance from Peanuts!
Because who doesn't love Peanuts?
This weekend, a rather weak offering that may have sold the fate of future Christian parable adventures. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).
1. The Chronicles of Narnia… (Fox) - $24.5, 3555 screens, week 1, $24.5 total
2. The Tourist (Sony)- $17.0, 2756 screens, week 1, $17.0 total
So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means nobody read any of the books after The Lion The Witch and the Wardrobe. Maybe just nobody liked them. Anyway, the third movie in the series opened up to a weak $24 million, probably slamming the final nail in the coffin of the series. Sure, it may have some legs thanks to the upcoming holiday season, but let's try and enjoy Aslan on the big screen while we can.
Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie in a movie that takes place in Vienna? That's gotta be an award for the prettiest movie ever made. (Naturally, after Hero). Anyway, the star power of these two wasn't quite enough to bring Pirate or Salt money, but the pairing attracted enough people to have a nice run in the upcoming weeks.
Black Swan expanded to a total of 90 screens to rank 6th on the board, which may be the highest rank a Darren Aronofsky film has ever attained on one of these charts. It's got the highest per screen average of the top ten, (not of the releases, though) and is generally kicking ass and taking names.
All the other flicks are hanging around. like guests at a party nobody wants to be at but are too polite to leave. That's right, I'm looking at you Love and Other Drugs, who only brought a vegetable platter to this shindig.
Fun Fact: When debating with friends over what the best Christmas movie of all time is, the only correct answer is Reindeer Games.
Below the radar, The Fighter, coming in with great awards and performances buzz, opened on 4 screens and took in $320,000 and the top per screen average ($80,000 per screen, beating Black Swan's record from last week). Most impressive. ALso released, Julie Taymor's triply version of The Tempest, with Helen Mirren and Russell Brand, took in $45,000 on 5 screens. Slightly less impressive.
So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, it's Tron time!
Dude here again. With great power comes great responsibility, a man once wrote. Then it was re-appropriated in a whole bunch of other comic book movies, more or less. Now the real question remains, everyone says it, but does anyone actually really listen to it?
Sorry, I just watched that Green Lantern trailer again, and it's starting to piss me off.
This weekend, my prediction was wrong, and the one movie did better than the others, even though there wasn't much in the way of competition. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).
9. The Warrior's Way (Rogue)- $3.0, 1662 screens, week 1, $3.0 total
10. The Next 3 Days (LGF) - $2.6, 2236 screens, week 3, $18.3 total
So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means Disney had sloppy second weekend, but still managed to out perform the young wizard with their animated tale of hair. Although, it's a steep drop from last week's take, but that's due to the lack of holiday.
Everything else remained in place, but not for long, as the first weekend in December is usually just a place holder weekend until the big holiday blockbusters assault us. So, that's why Burlesque and Unstoppable have made the almost the same thing in a tied for third, and Love and Other Drugs is so prominent towards the top. Sad state, but what are you gonna do?
I can not stress enough how awesome The Warrior's Way is. It's poor, MacGruber-esque performance aside, you should make every effort you can to see this movie while it still remains on a screen. You won't regret it.
Fun Fact: The Nutcracker 3D movie is allegedly horribly racist, in addition to being over two hours long, making it "Must See" for me.
Below the radar, Black Swan finally opened up on 18 screens, and blew away pretty much everyone else by taking in $1,394,000 and the highest per screen average of the weekend . Also, this weekend FINALLY saw the release of I Love You Phillip Morris, a dark comedy directed by the guys who wrote Bad Santa starring Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor… how did this movie not get released until now?!? Anyway, it opened on 6 screens and took in $113,000, not bad considering it didn't look like it would come out at all.
AND… the Dutch horror flick Rare Exports, about the trapping and auctioning of Santa Claus opened on one screen and took in $9,500. Outstanding.
So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, even if we didn't ask for it, we're getting another Narnia movie! This one's on a boat!
You'll be hard pressed to find a film as enormously awesome, and legitimately entertaining, as The Warrior's Way. A bizarre pastiche of samurai film and western, Warrior's Way somehow manages to find just the right balance of ludicrous and fantastic, with it's tongue firmly planted in it's cheek but never letting us know that it's in on the joke. It's like a Terry Gilliam Cannon film.
Here's a list of the things this movie has:
Ninjas.
Cowboys.
Circus Freaks.
Tony Cox, playing the character "8-Ball".
A whole TOWN full of circus freaks.
Geoffrey Rush
Kate Bosworth's hilarious overacting. Then throwing knives.
Not backing down out when it comes to violence.
Geoffrey Rush playing the town drunk.
Better CG blood than Expendables.
Freakin' Danny Huston! With a scar on his face!
Emotion.
Interesting characters.
Stunning visuals.
Geoffrey Rush playing the town drunk, shooting sticks of dynamite from a ferris wheel.
If you don't like these things in a movie, then you've failed as a human being. For everyone else, there's The Warrior's Way. Check it out, you won't regret it.
Irvin Kershner has gone and left us. First Leslie Neilsen, and now this.
In an odd coincidence, I caught myself watching Empire Strikes Back last night on Spike. Sure, I watched it commercial free about a month ago (while my wife was at her bachelorette party) but it was on, and I have to watch it whenever it's on. It truly is a great film.
The last film Kershner directed was Robocop 2, which isn't anywhere near as good as Empire, or the original Robocop, but it has a strange perverse weirdness to it that makes it worth watching.
Dude here again. Coming off the holiday weekend. Not too many turkey naps this weekend, and no lunacy shopping at 5 in the morning. Just some nice family, a nice meal, and some black tar heroin.
Wait, what?
This weekend, that little punk wizard continues his domination, despite ample competition that wasn't really competitive at all. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).
1. Harry Potter and the Etc…. (WB)- $50.3, 4125 screens, week 2, $220.3 total
So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means Harry Potter has managed to capture the top spot for two weeks in a row! A feat not accomplished sine Goblet of Fire was released during the same time period five years ago. For fun, I took out my BO report from that weekend. Here's what I wrote:
"Well, if you're Harry Potter, you took the top once again, to no one else's surprise. It crossed the $200 million mark this weekend, not bad for about ten days of release. I have a feeling next week, it will once again take the crown, then start to lose steam once the Narnia movie and King Kong come out. But I've been wrong in the past, so who knows?"
I could basically take out the words "King Kong" and accurately predict the next two weeks of box office. It's difficult being this awesome sometimes. But well worth it.
Tangled, Disney's latest that isn't a Pixar but is still a computer animated fairy tale, fared quite well in its' first week of release. Almost taking the top spot, even. Not bad, and the lighter tone probably attracted a lot of kids who might have been "too scared" for the Harry Potter. Pussies. But yeah, don't expect Disney to stop making fairy tale movies just because they say they're going to. Because money talks, people.
As for the other new releases.. ouch. Burlesque didn't attract nearly the right amount of ironic viewers to make a significant dent, but not bad. Love and Other Drugs didn't make nearly enough to justify the amount of love and other drugs I had to take to sit through it.
And Faster? Not so fast, Dwayne Johnson. As much as I applaud any movie you star in the contains an R rating AND Billy Bob Thornton, it looks like I'm gonna have to act faster if I want to see this in a theater.
Fun Fact: I clipped my nails in the middle of writing this box office report!
Below the radar, Oscar-bation continues with the release of the heavily hyped The King's Speech, which took in $350,000 on 4 screens, with an amazing $87,500 per screen average. Expect to hear a lot about this one. Also, The Nutcracker 3D opened up on 42 screens and took in $68,000. Pretty bad, but here's another fun fact, it's from the man who directed Tango & Cash, which means I have to track down a theater and see it.
So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, a whole lotta nothing and one movie about Ninjas in the old west, co-starring Geoffrey Rush, which means it will be spectacular.
Dude here again. Enjoying a fall morning. Poring over some box office numbers, with some green tea, chorizo and toast.
Come join me, won't you?
This weekend, in a stunning upset, Russell Crowe's movie defeats Harry Potter. And then Paul HAggis wakes up to disappointment. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).
1. Harry Potter and the Etc…. (WB)- $125.1, 4125 screens, week 1, $125.1 total
7. Skyline (Uni)- $3.4, 2883 screens, week 2, $17.6 total
8. Red (Sum)- $2.4, 2034 screens, week 6, $83.5 total
9. For Colored Girls (LGF) - $2.4, 1216 screens, week 3, $34.5 total
10. Fair Game (Sum) - $1.4, 386 screens, week 3, $3.7 total
So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means that if Warner Bros didn't have half a brain, and released the new Harry Potter movie in the half assed 3D conversion we get, it still wouldn't beat that Dark Knight or Twilight record. But it's fun to dream about other people's money.
The Next Three Days, Russell Crowe's latest that I'll probably go see because I think Crowe is a solid actor and I like him in everything, even if the movies he's in aren't that great. But, yeah, a noble effort that was probably unnecessarily quashed.
It's nice to see Fair Game up in the top ten. It's not so nice when you realize it is NOT the Fair Game where Cindy Crawford gets naked.
Fun Fact: Aforementioned Fair Game is based on the same novel that Stallone adapted for his hit vehicle Cobra!
Below the radar, something called Today's Special took in $91,000 on 55 screens, something called Made in Dagenham took in $41,100 on 3 screens, and something called White Material made $36,300, also on 3 screens.
So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, a whole bunch of new ones come out, including an animated fairy tale, a musical with Cher, and a movie with The Rock, which is all around news for celebration.
Trailers, for the most part, are starting to bug me. Part of me wants to blame it on age (Too loud, too many cuts and flashes, it's giving me a headache, etc.) and part of me thinks they give too much away.Either way, I find myself using that trailer time to take an all important last trip to the men's room before the movie starts, so I don't have another Star Trek/Inception incident.
That being said, these are some recently released trailers I've seen that look pretty flippin awesome.
Battle: Los Angeles - The movie could turn out to be worse than Skyline. But this is a great trailer, no matter how you slice it.
Your Highness - Fantasy movie from David Gordon Green, written by McBride, has a weird Gilliam vibe to it. Even if it turns out to be a mess, it's a spectacular mess. This is the red band, which means more cursing and brief Natalie Portman in a thong action.
Just a bit of disclosure, I have read the first 5 books twice, and the last two only one time each. I have seen the movies multiple times, though, the first three repeatedly due to my former job as a projectionist. In general, yes I am a Harry Pot-head.
Unfortunately, I haven't figured out how quite to Live Blog on this site, so I'm just gonna keep this open and update it whenever I write something new! I think that's what the kids call live blogging these days.
I don't know, I'm of the 1.0 generation.
Let's Begin!
WARNING - It may get a little blue. And spoilers, I guess, too.
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9:13 AM - Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone - Chapter 1
So far so good.
9:14 AM - 2 pages down. Where the fuck is this Potter kid? What's with all these damn hippies in the streets?
9:15 AM - Oh, right. He's a baby.
9:16 AM - Thanks to former college roommate Jay, who bought this book ten years ago because he wanted to read anything that schools were banning. And then forgot that I was the last person he loaned it to.
9:22 AM - One Chapter down! 30 some odd left.
9:28 AM - Man, Harry's aunt and uncle are dicks.
9:38 AM- Alright, Chapter 4 already!
9:44 AM - These are really short chapters. This book is super easy to read.
9:52 AM - Did the screenwriters just copy and paste the text for the first film? Or am I just glossing over nostalgia and cinematic memories?
9:55 AM - Inspired by my last question, I've decided to play the movie in the background. The rate I'm ripping through these chapters, I might be able to finish them both at the same time, although I doubt the scenes will match up.
10:01 AM - There are a lot of ads on this first DVD.
10:04 AM - Yeah, it's almost dead on. I know why they cut the things they cut, but I'll be damned.
10:05 AM - This was a bad idea. I've stopped reading. Like our nation's youth after the last Harry Potter book. (ZING!) Time to turn off the television.
10:09 AM - YAY! Harry got an Owl!
10:15 AM- These are awesome descriptions of this bizarre new world Harry Potter has entered.
10:22 AM - Already at Hogwarts! Let the fun begin!
10:28 AM - I wish Ithaca College was more like Hogwarts. Would have been a more wondrous and magical educational experience. Didn't even mean that pun!
10:35 AM - I should really look for a job instead of reading 7 books today. Probably be a smart move.
10:36 AM - Yay Quidditch!
10:41 AM - Hmmm... internet conked out. Gonna keep typing, and when it comes back, I'll post the backlog.
10:46 AM - Wow, taking a few moments away from reading to type is really kind of distracting. How did Mike Ryan do this with 6 movies?!? I guess it's easier with movies vs. print.
10:53 AM - Do I even have the other books? I'm pretty sure I have the last two, but I think my old roommate has the other ones. Son of a...
10:59 AM - This is a stupid idea. I have tons of other books I should read instead of re-reading something. There's Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, which I should get to before the movie gets made so I can say that the book was better.
11:08 AM - Enough of this foolishness. I'm gonna watch Doom instead.
11:15 AM - Universal logo over Red Mars instead of Earth! Goddamn this movie rocks!
11:22 AM - Handle ID, The Kid? Handle ID Goat? Handle ID Sarge? Not even disguising that this is a video game.
11:30 AM - WHOA! The female lead is Grimm's SISTER?!?! What a twist! Hopefully this movie passes the Bechdel test!
11:31 AM - Oh right. It doesn't.
11:34 AM - Nobody's splitting off into pairs. Smart. You don't want to mess with these things.
11:40 AM - "Does it bother you that you could have spent your life behind a microscope instead of a sniper scope?" "If they're so smart, how come they're so dead?" That's how you write fuckin dialog, Sorkin. Take a lesson, then eat a bowl of dick.
11:40 AM - Studio 60 my ass.
11:55 AM - The Kid is on drugs! How can he hunt for monsters on drugs?!? Unless it's a statement about how much more fun video games are when you're on drugs. This movie's got layers, people.
11:58 AM - Like an onion.
12:04 PM - Any movie that requires the use of a bone saw gets an extra half star.
12:09 PM - Is there a better modern day composer than Clint Mansell? His work here is hardcore, I need it to follow me around. Especially at the gym.
12:17 PM - Portman, you bastard! You sold out the rest of the crew!!
12:28 PM - Made myself a sandwich. Mesquite Turkey and Pepper Jack Cheese. Pretty tasty.
12:19 PM - Big Fuckin Gun! And it looks like it shoots fluoride, to boot!
12:20 PM - Oh man, some shit is going down!!!!! Cage-match style!!
12:23 PM - The creature kinda looks like "Satan" in Split Second, with Rutger Hauer. That movie rocks, too. Is it on DVD?
12:24 PM - No, it is not. Note to future film programmers, great double feature here.
12:25 PM - The Rock is starting to lose it! Oh no!
12:28 PM - So there's an extra chromosome that allows the creature to choose between good and evil? Haven't seen that in a movie before. Way to tread new ground! No sarcasm required.
12:31 PM - Oh shit! It's made its way to the ark and is now on Earth! We're doomed!
12:32 PM - Oh, I get it, Doom!
12: 38 PM - Now the Rock is full on section 8. Ordering the Kid to kill civilians? The village was cleared, the people are innocent Sarge!
12:39 PM - (That line's from Universal Soldier, but kinda fits anyway)
12:44 PM - First Person Shooter scene. Most innovative thing in cinema this past decade. Cameron didn't even TRY to replicate it with Delgo 2: The Quickening. So good, I have to share it. Thanks You Tube.
12:51 PM - SHOWDOWN!! URBAN V. ROCK!!! WHOEVER WINS, WELL, WE ALL WIN, REALLY!!!
12:59 PM - End credits! Nice, they blow everyone away except those who survived the movie!
1:07 PM - Cool, I still have the rest of the day to look for work. Hopefully the internet is back up and running!
1:08 PM - It's not. Time for Death Race or Outlander! But no more live blogging. At least, not until I can figure it out.
UPDATE: 10:53 PM - Still no job, but watching Troll, which features not one, but TWO characters named Harry Potter.
Like you, I occasionally have a lull from all my big business dealings and coke-fueled hooker orgies and I find myself with a little bit of time to spare. And what better way to waste it than by reading lots of awesome things on the Interwebs!?!
"Our relationship with the English language predates our relationships with our phones."
Next up, an awesome series over at The AV Club about Grunge in the 90s. They're up to part 4, but it's best to start at the beginning. The AV Club has a bunch of terrific series, like My Year of Flops and The New Cult Cannon, but this is the first one not involving movies I voraciously tore through.
Dude here again. Coming at you with your bi-monthly box office report. Why bi-monthly? Because it's been a really busy time lately. What could possibly take me away from the fun of reporting the exchange of millions of dollars between consumers and multimedia conglomerates in exchange for two hours of entertainment?
Let's just say I took Beyonce's advice, and put a ring on it.
This weekend, a clam before the Harry Potter storm. Or calm. Kinda works either way. But not really. Let's go to the numbers, shall we? (All in millions, remember, and these are the studio estimates. The actuals will be available on Monday).
So those are the numbers, but what do they mean? Well, it means that 3D animation trumps Denzel's speeding train. In an underwhelming weekend, Megamind continues to take in money that will next week go to the magical wizard. Because it wouldn't be a holiday season without an animated movie to distract us all.
Unstoppable proved to be stoppable (I feel shame for writing that) but still good enough for an impressive $23 million opening, on par with most Denzel Washington action fare. Bonus points for being a PG-13 Tony Scott movie. Rare is that.
Skyline is a curious case. It came in fourth, but made back its production budget, impressive for a movie financed by the FX house that created everything. (Thanks to that facial mapping of Armie Hammer in Social Network). But it's garnered some horrible reviews, most with the words "Gloriously" and "retarded". Yet, with each horrific thing I read, my desire to see it increases exponentially.
Morning Glory, evening sadness.
Fun Fact: Hollywood actually took a break and didn't release a Christmas themed movie in early November! Progress!
Below the radar, Tiny Furniture, a movie whose preview is so twee it makes Paper Heart look like There Will Be Blood, opened up to an impressive $22,450. What makesthat so impressive is that was solely on one screen. Elsewhere, 127 Hours expanded and took in $453,000 on 22 screens. Gotta love a Danny Boyle flick.
So there, you have my amazing break down. Next week, I may have mentioned the wizard movie, but there's also a Russell Crowe movie, which makes me smile a little bit.
